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Saturday, June 12, 2010

Right Decision

You would almost have to be hiding under a rock last week to have not heard that Al and Tipper Gore are splitting after 40 years of marriage. FORTY YEARS.

Although I cannot assume to know the reasons why the Gores are going their separate ways after so many years and 4 children; I do know that there must of come a point when they were no longer each other’s priority.

Just in case you are not already aware, no marriage is fail proof. NO marriage is safe. 1 Peter 5:8 tells us that there is an enemy out there prowling around just looking for the right moment to devour and he will not pass you by just because you have a few years of bliss under your marital belt.

Hear this; YOUR MARRIAGE IS NOT SAFE. I know, scary right?

To have a great successful and lasting marriage ladies, that man of yours HAS to be your number one earthly relationship and priority.

Let’s go to the Bible shall we…

Admonish the young women to love their husbands. Titus 2:4

The word love here emphasizes affection; a friendship. Let me say it this way, he should be your best friend, one in whom you want to be with more than any other person, including your children.

There will come a day when those kids will be grown, and then gone. What then?

If you have not cultivated your friendship with your spouse that is where the enemy will come in and try to devour.

So, what can you do to help make until death do us part become the only way you part? Make that right decision today to stop and cultivate your friendship.

I have a dear friend that lives close to me but our lives are very busy with our churches, our families, and ministering in our respective areas. We meet up every three months for a catch up lunch. We will spend hours together sharing about our lives, our children and husbands and our relationship with God.

Before we go our separate ways we ALWAYS break out our calendars and make an appointment for our next lunch three months out. Why?  Because if we don’t do it right then, we may never do it. Oh we may want to get together again, we may talk about getting together again, but unless we are proactive about setting a time to do it, chances are, we won’t.

You have to be just as vigilant with your husbands. If it takes breaking out the calendar to set aside everything else in your life, then that is exactly what you two need to do. Be proactive about cultivating your relationship.

And if you feel you have nothing in common anymore with your husband, that there is not anything you two could possibly discuss over even an hour long meal, I beg to differ.

You are a family… with a future; start there.

Plan out the rest of your lives. Dream together about where you want to be in 5, 10 or 20 years. Plan a once in a life time vacation and then make a plan to begin saving for it. Talk about the good things in your lives and how God has blessed you thus far and how you know He’s going to keep right on blessing you.

I know when you were dating you had those long nights of endless conversations that you prayed would never end. He’s still that same person. Things may have changed. You may know him better and some of those things you know better about him you may wish you could change.

But we said I do.

Now we have to DO all we know to do to have a successful marriage.

(I think this is the place where the preacher asks, Amen?)


Next time I am going to tackle some of the issues you may be dealing with when it comes to your spouse. You know, the things that make you have to love Him with the love of Christ because you can’t do it with your flesh. Yeah, so check back, because we are going to be writing things out on paper that I promise will change some things... or at least someone.

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